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Saturday, 14 November 2009

  • Homesick once in a blue moon on a rainy day.

    I miss my friends so much its unbelievable. While I am write my essay on Chinua Achebe's No Longer At Ease, my heart is back in Singapore, back at those times where we just hung out at starbucks because there is nothing else to do in Singapore, or when we had dinner and I always chose the location (therefore we always end up at sushi tei). And I miss the way my friends laughed and rolled their eyes and said fuck you to each other over the silliest things (maybe it was just me). I miss wanting's weird laughter, I miss juang's intellectual conversations about her thoughts, I miss trang's annoying ipod and earphones which were constantly plugged in. I miss cen and the way she is used to every fucked up habit of mine, I miss vic and her house and her reluctance to move a step out of it. I miss the jeannie and our little supper adventures, I miss charmaine and her squeaky voice and shortness.



    Disappointment is a terrible feeling. Knowing that you have disappointed someone could be even worse. I know this can't be anything, which makes me want it more. I'm not a realist.
    I'm a terrible terrible person. Selfish and terrible person.


Friday, 13 November 2009

  • You're like a Crossword I can't solve

    You are my fire
    The one desire
    Believe when I say
    I want it that way

    But we are two worlds apart
    Can't reach to your heart
    When you say
    That I want it that way

    And maybe I shouldn't attempt it. Because I don't want to be trying so hard to figure out the answers, and end up failing and feeling nothing but stupid and silly for even trying in the first place.

    I will not think anymore. Thoughts are bringing me down. Its too complex for my simple and uncomplicated nature.

Wednesday, 11 November 2009

  • If you were on the ice with me tonight.

    I'm going to the library in a little while. I'm starting to like Bobst even though its not very pretty on the outside. Just now all of us went ice skating and I was on 86th street which in a way reminded me of some great nights. Anyway ice skating was so much fun, the music was great and it was just nice to see so many people I know at the same place. I haven't been skating for like 5 years so I was pretty surprised that I could still move.

    The nights here are so pretty and little things like ice skating with friends, studying late at night or receiving a call from someone who just called to say hi makes me very happy.

    New York, I'm falling in love with you.

Tuesday, 10 November 2009

  • Thank God For America

    I'm so glad I came here, because I've definitely become more independent, stronger and happier. And I can actually see things from a better angle.

    Now apparently Dwi broke up with Paul and started talking to Tim again (I mean seriously how fucked up is that), but right now I just feel disgust and not even hurt anymore. I think maybe the two of the belong together because they are both so fucked up (I know that sounds childish and spiteful, but I don't know how else to put it), and I'm glad I broke up/took a break with Tim before any of this happened. And at least now I know when he says he loves me/misses me/wants me/wants to wait for me/will do anything to be with me/will only want to be with me is all worthless crap that comes out of his lying mouth. I know him, and what he's doing with her, I just feel very disgusted because I mean just look at her. Apart from perhaps Paul, I have not heard a compliment or a good thing said about her. I mean I would be lying if I said I didn't care, because I do care. But honestly I'm at a point where I just feel like I've had enough from Tim. I went through a lot with him and I loved him, but I won't anymore.


  • Thank God For America

    I'm so glad I came here, because I've definitely become more independent, stronger and happier. And I can actually see things from a better angle.

    Now apparently Dwi started talking to Tim again, but right now I just feel disgust and not even hurt anymore. I think maybe the two of the belong together because they are both so fucked up (I know that sounds childish and spiteful, but I don't know how else to put it), and I'm glad I broke up/took a break with Tim before any of this happened. And at least now I know when he says he loves me/misses me/wants me/wants to wait for me/will do anything to be with me/will only want to be with me is all worthless crap that comes out of his lying mouth. I know him, and what he's doing with her, I just feel very disgusted because I mean just look at her. Apart from perhaps Paul, I have not heard a compliment or a good thing said about her. I mean I would be lying if I said I didn't care, because I do care. But honestly I'm at a point where I just feel like I've had enough from Tim. I went through a lot with him and I loved him, but I won't anymore.


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    • Name: Pei Xi
    • Birthday: 12/7/1990
    • Gender: Female
    • Member Since: 12/6/2005

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