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Tuesday, 09 February 2010

  • Just For Laughs

    SAGITTARIUS WOMEN:

    A tall (wrong) slim (wrong) and graceful (wrong) woman, who walks proudly like she is walking in a beauty pageant. If she slips or nearly falls, she will nicely covered it up and continue with her graceful and impressive walking step. She knows how to use make up (wrong) to enhance her beauty. She looks at the world positively, so her face always seems so happy (HAHA I have never heard of people telling me that my face seems happy, its always fierce).

    She will not get upset easily. She is a confident woman who believes in her own style (true). She will not follow fashion (true), but she stands in between simplicity and too modern. She is a very open person, but can sometimes be too blunt (true). She is an honest person and never tries to cause troubles for any one.

    She can say something that you do not want to hear and yet say something so pleasing at the same time. For example, she may say “I wish you could make more money, so you could afford better clothes. But anyway it is better this way. If you make more money you could be thinking of money too much and end up becoming greedy”. She says things like that which makes you wonder if you should get upset or love her more. (I have no idea if I do that)

    She is also a free spirit and does not like to stay home (true). She likes to be protected, but she does not like others to give her orders (VERY true). She has no respect to a weak man (true). If she tries to over-power you, then you have to calm her down and try to control her. She will listen if she respects you (true). She likes to be herself and like her guy to be himself (true x 100).

    She is a no nonsense woman (what the hell does "no nonsense woman" mean), so you will not hear she says “Guess what I will do next”, or “Guess what I am thinking” because she always say what she is thinking out loud like a guy (yes most of the time). If you do not understand her in this matter, you could easily break up with her. She sees problems in her love life as another funny story. (wtf no.)

    She is clumsy and it is in her nature. You may think it is cute, but for some neat guys this could be so unbearable. She is very friendly (HAHA I doubt it), so she can easily turn her enemy to be her friends. She has good taste in fine cloths, good food, first class and first services (yes yes yes, thank you thank you). Even a poor woman in this Zodiac will struggle to afford such good taste. She could spend lots of money as if she can not understand how difficult it is to make money (I can imagine my parents nodding profusely to this). If you think of let her borrow money, think again. (HAHAHAHAHA)

    She can be paranoid (yeah duh, if I don't trust you). If she thinks you like her, she may already think about getting married and lost her freedom and so on and on (wrong). She is a jolly woman who loves sports. She is an ordinary woman who could dress like a tomboy (I think I dress very girly!). She has more guy friends (completely not) and sometimes could act like a guy (But cat says YES to "act like a guy"). She does not care about rumors, so she can get home very late and couldn’t care less what her neighbor will gossip about her. She thinks either good or bad, you will know it yourself, so you should not bother what people think. (extremely true as my friends would know)

    Her wit and innocent look are her charms. She is often hurts from love (sometimes), but never afraid to look for a new one as if she is singing “Do That To Me One More Time”. She likes being straight forward. She will not go around to get what she wants, or beat around the bush just to say something. (indeed) If you meet her and tell her straight what you think, she will admire you.


    HAHAHAHA this is quite funny but quite true too. I read other people's horoscopes too and it really is quite true. This site is pretty good I must say. AND YES I SHOULD BE DOING MY HOMEWORK. OKAY BYE.

Monday, 08 February 2010

  • in between question 4 and 5 of stats assignment 1

    Then I thought of a question someone asked me not very long ago :)

    "I don't understand, why do you have a blog and a diary?"

    At the point of time I gave a very quick undetailed answer. But I wrote in my diary again today and it made me think what was the difference. In my diary, I can be vulnerable, I can really open up my mind my thoughts, everything. But its very summarised because if I have to write very much I end up not writing at all, and thats why I bought a diary that only has 2 lines for writing on each page. So its usually straight to the point, and also displaying my weakest side. But my blog I mean it has a lot of emotions and thoughts, but its more rationale. After I blog, I straighten out my thoughts, I understand myself a little bit better and on good days, feel a little bit stronger. But can't really decide which is really me, I guess my diary has the more significant things thats all.

    Today I wanted to write something in my diary I didn't have the courage to write out here, but I decided not to just because there weren't enough lines and me being me, I really can't stand writing in the middle of the page. So I guess I'll either keep it in or write a private post.

    Its weird how often I post, and how I usually blog only when I'm bored. I guess its not only therapeutic, but its like talking to someone logically and clearly, which I usually can't do. Most things I want to say tend to come out wrong. But when I type, everything just flows. Also, not to mention, I really like the sound of typing on the keyboard. It sounds like I'm very busy doing something important.

    Sorry this is so long and nonsensical because this is sort of one of those "stress posts" in between doing homework and I'm just blogging to distract myself a little bit it doesn't actually have much meaning.

    I really want to be musically talented. Everytime I hear trang play the guitar and sing I just feel like melting away. I want to borrow someone's guitar and learn how to play 'Halo' because its my favourite song as of now. But given how NOT musically-inclined (I shall call it musically-declined haha) I am, its going to take me like 6 months to learn it and by then, Halo will probably not be my favourite song anymore.


    Today I tried to understand why I'm so uncontented, and I couldn't.
    Am I really asking for too much?

    Tonight I will pray for you. I'll pray that you get your straight road back.

Saturday, 06 February 2010

  • The downside of happiness

    One thing I don't like about being young is being fragile. One thing I don't like about being young and being a girl is being silly hopeful. One thing I don't about like being young and being me is the fact that in the end, I still end up letting my heart control my head.

    Today morning I woke up and I was scared that yesterday was just a dream. Today morning I woke up but I just laid in bed which I almost never do. That very moment is still replaying in my mind. And I have so much to say, not about the day, not about what I'm thinking, but just about the part of you that I know. But I won't.

    Okay so I guess my head still has random moments where it trumps my heart. Credits to the years of training. But sometimes I wish everything would be perfect, nobody gets hurt, people will stop finding ways to protect themselves, and everything will be real and pure and uncalculated. Right now I really don't want to care if everything is 1-to-1 anymore.

    I feel like going to the gym, but it so far away and its so cold outside, probably snowing too. I wish spring would come already. Also kind of feel like having pinkberry.

Friday, 05 February 2010

  • I think a little piece of my heart just broke away

    Today is no doubt the best day of 2010 so far.

    After class today I went back to rubin, I walked through the turnstiles with my iced tall non fat extra caramel caramel macchiato in my hand, and then everything went in slow motion. I couldn't believe my eyes and my heart felt like it was pounding but skipping beats at the same time. I haven't felt this way in a long long long time. Thanks for making my day, thanks for making my week, thanks for making me smile.

    Very unfortunately, good things generally don't last very long for me. This time I only got 5.5 hours of it. And for me goodbyes just get harder and harder, last time it took me 3 months to feel that sadness, this time it took half a day. But no complains, I really am thankful, I just wished for a little more time. I would give a lot just to let the day flow away with you again. Maybe to you I just seemed surprised, maybe I don't say it, but that's because I don't even know how to begin explaining what this has done for me.

    Remember those walls I built
    Well, baby they're tumbling down
    And they didn't even put up a fight
    They didn't even make up a sound


    So I guess, I'll see you soon.
  • EMERIA TIALA

    YOU IDIOT, GET A GRIP ON YOURSELF. BE STRONG UNDERSTAND?
    I was going to comment on your blog but it will be very long so i decided to write here. EMZYS, you are better than you think okay? seriously you are. It doesn't matter what other people say, it doesn't matter if your days are bad, it doesn't even matter if you feel like the world is against you and everything/everyone is just bringing you to the ground. What matters is how you look at yourself. If you're going to agree with the horrible things other people say to you, you're never going to be good. You're just going to be digging a deeper hole for yourself. Get out of the freaking shithole and stop looking back you get it? Look forward, find a solution. Like you said, its already too late, but it doesn't mean you are stuck where you are, you can find ways to make it better. And I know there will always be days when you just feel inadequate, especially when you feel like the person you care about has left for a whole better world while you are stuck where you are. And I hope that on days like these, you'll remember that trang and I love you and care about you very much. And I hope that'll help you pull through.








    If you, if you could return
    Don't let it burn, don't let it fade

    You still Linger in my thoughts, every little bit, every day.

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